Women, You Are Not Wrong, You Are Angry
Build yourself a new groove — a Women of Earth invitation.
I love seeing fellow women being angry when they used to be scared. When I witness how appropriate their anger is, it builds new grooves inside of myself that replace my previously unconscious fear-based responses.
In recent movies and TV shows, I can now watch women being outraged when a man invades their home, their work or their planet.
That is what I remember from watching ‘Reacher’, the TV Show in which the female lead character is a badass policewoman. In the third episode, some gangster men break into her home and ransack her apartment. When her and Reacher walk in, she immediately draws her gun looking for the intruders. After making sure the place is clear, Reacher reaches out to this steadfast woman to reassure her that he will take care of these gangsters, and she has nothing to worry about. As he is about to put his comforting hands on her shoulder, she leaps sideways, pushes away his hand, and storms: “You think I am scared? I am not scared. I am fucking pissed off. These people think they can break into my home that I fixed up with my money, in the town that my family built.”
Grooves inevitably sink in when the culture persists in treating you as a scared victim who cannot take care of yourself. I registered my own surprise when this short blond-haired woman exploded the usual box of ‘feminine answers’. I cheered for the new option now available to me!
Another example is in ‘The Fall Guy’. We watched it on one of our matrix building movie nights in the Cavitation Bridgehouse. In this movie, Emily Blunt plays a movie director. As she is working in her trailer, a man disguised as an alien sneaks in, puts his hand on her mouth to prevent her from screaming. She does scream, but her very next instinct is to grab anything at arm’s length that she can use as a weapon to free herself from his grip. She goes on to jump on the man’s back, beating him with miscellaneous objects, Jason Bourne-style. The man does not back down, and nor does she. She rages, “Do you think you can come to MY set and sneak up on me?!” Not for one second did she hesitate to protect herself, but also her work place from someone thinking that they could show up and scare her.
All the Women of Earth in the Bridgehouse were yipping and rooting for the demonstration of this epic cultural evolution broadcasted to millions around the world.
Fiction is becoming reality in Zimbabwe, where former Australian special forces soldier and anti-poaching leader Damien Mander built a women-only team of rangers. These formerly abused and marginalized girls are training to awaken the Warrioress in them. Their purpose: protecting the elephants at the brink of extinction. They are trained to arrest and if needed, kill poachers. They are revolutionizing the way animals are protected, empowering their own communities and transforming their own lives serving their land and Gaia at large.
Akashinga: The Brave Ones | National Geographic, executive producer: James Cameron.
If you find yourself crying watching this video, it may well be your own Warrioress within calling. If She wants more, Rage Club is the Archan Initiatory Process to ignite your Feelings Archetypes (note: ‘Archetype’ in here is not used within the Freudian-Jungian context. More about Feelings Archetypes is in the Archetypal Lineage website here).
It confirms, for me, the necessity to keep practicing the martial art of Krav Maga in Women of Earth Labs. When we practice self-defense in these transformational trainings, women reveal many conflicting constructs, stories and huge emotional fears to learn to take care of themselves.
One of the most common “reasons” for women preemptively disabling themselves is the deep ingrained belief that “I am wrong”. When I question the origins of this belief, women often cannot pinpoint the moment or the person who told them that they were wrong. They simply say, “I am a woman, therefore I am wrong. If something goes wrong, it is my fault.” In patriarchy, women locate their point-of-origin in ‘I am wrong’.
I am highly suspicious that one cause is that christian religious thoughtware has thoroughly pervaded modern culture’s psycho-emotional tradition. Eve bit the fruit. A woman who took us down from paradise. It is a woman’s fault.
I am not so much interested in the source of this despicable belief as I am in women healing and leaving behind the patriarchy shackles that keep us undangerous. The purpose of this article is not to promote physical violence. My purpose is to liberate women from the cultural prison of our terror of wrongness that we are molded into from the earliest age.
For this, I share with you an experiment that I have successfully taken on and that I have offered to a number of women.
The experiment is WHEN YOU ARE SCARED OF BEING WRONG, BE ANGRY INSTEAD.
The transformational power of this experiment is to build new grooves of action and reaction making use of your conscious anger. The new grooves replace the outdated patriarchal game of playing the card of “I cannot do it because I am scared of being wrong”.
It goes like this.
Catch yourself as you are about to say “I am afraid of speaking / acting / going / trying something new / taking a risk / saying ‘yes’ / saying ‘no’ / saying what I want … because…” and instead replace it with saying “I am angry because…” You may not know what you are angry about at first. You are making a new trench! It takes practice to dig into new awareness.
Maybe, you finally say “I am angry that I cannot play full out in my life because a priest/teacher/parent made me believe that I am wrong.”
“I feel angry that I deceive myself that it is okay for someone to violate my space.”
“I am angry that I force myself to be nice when I notice what is wrong.”
The experiment continues as you practice maturing your conscious anger into reclaiming your Dignity and Arrogance about the Value of your Being.
Your anger now can declare, “I refuse to diminish myself even 1% to make other people comfortable.”
“I decide now that I will stop lying to myself and others about what I feel.”
“I am so angry that I no longer wait for others to make it easy for me.”
This is the perfect moment to introduce to you my new favorite phrase: “Fuck this shit.”
Whenever you notice yourself going down the same old groove of the scared wrong woman, say out loud: “Fuck this shit. This game is over. I am angry.”